by Sanford L. Braver (Author)
Synopsis and insight by Gary Da Silva
Summary: “Divorced Dads: Shattering the Myths” by Sanford L. Braver, with Diane O’Connell, challenges the common negative stereotypes about divorced fathers. Based on 12 years of research and interviews with divorced families, Braver debunks myths such as deadbeat dads, runaway dads, and unfair divorce settlements. He highlights flaws in previous studies and presents his data showing that both parents fare similarly post-divorce. Braver advocates for joint legal custody and suggests non-adversarial divorce processes to support both parents and children better.
Insight:
The key concerns regarding how fathers are treated post-divorce include:
- Stereotypes and Myths:
- Fathers are often stereotyped as “deadbeat dads,” “runaway dads,” or absentee parents. These myths suggest that fathers are less committed or responsible in their roles post-divorce. Only 6% to 7% of fathers fit the true definition of the stereotype of a deadbeat dad.
- Bias in Custody Decisions:
- There is a perception that custody decisions tend to favour mothers over fathers, often leading to fathers having less time and involvement with their children. 91% of children are automatically awarded to the mother in South Africa as acknowledged in the responding affidavit by the Family Advocates Office in the VonGinkle, Louw, Fabian et al Case at the equality court.
- Child Support Issues:
- Fathers are frequently depicted as failing to pay child support. However, research indicates that many fathers do pay, and problems in support payments often arise from financial hardships rather than unwillingness.
South Africa currently as of July 2024 +/- 32% of the employable workforce are unemployed, and an additional +/- 30% have given up looking for work. South Africa is sitting with more than 60% of its workforce in South Africa unemployed which has a direct negative impact on fathers being able to pay maintenance.
- Fathers are frequently depicted as failing to pay child support. However, research indicates that many fathers do pay, and problems in support payments often arise from financial hardships rather than unwillingness.
- Emotional Impact:
- The emotional well-being of fathers post-divorce is often overlooked. There is a misconception that fathers fare better emotionally, whereas research shows they can experience significant distress and emotional turmoil.
- Economic Consequences:
- There is a belief that fathers are economically better off after a divorce, but studies indicate that both parents typically experience financial strain post-divorce, with fathers often facing challenges in meeting child support obligations while managing their own living expenses.
- Parental Alienation:
- Fathers may experience parental alienation, where the other parent intentionally disrupts or undermines their relationship with the children, leading to reduced contact and strained relationships.
See our Letter to the United Nations regarding this.
- Fathers may experience parental alienation, where the other parent intentionally disrupts or undermines their relationship with the children, leading to reduced contact and strained relationships.
- Legal and Social Barriers:
- Fathers often face legal and social obstacles in asserting their rights for equal parenting time and joint custody, with courts and social services sometimes being unsupportive or biased against them.
- Rebuttable Presumption of Joint Custody:
- There is a call for a rebuttable presumption of joint legal custody to ensure that both parents have equal rights and responsibilities unless evidence suggests it would be harmful to the child.
Fathers 4 Justice South Africa advocates for immediate, automatic joint equal shared 50/50 contact, care guardianship and maintenance from birth, irrespective of your marital status, religion, culture, tradition and other social norms and practices
- There is a call for a rebuttable presumption of joint legal custody to ensure that both parents have equal rights and responsibilities unless evidence suggests it would be harmful to the child.
- Need for Support Programs:
- Fathers require more support programs tailored to their unique challenges post-divorce, including mental health services, parenting support, and legal assistance.
- Non-Adversarial Divorce Processes:
- Advocating for non-adversarial divorce processes can help mitigate the adversities fathers face, promoting cooperation and better outcomes for both parents and children.
Divorced Dads, Shattering the Myths Article
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